


Humiliated

by WatchforWitches



Series: Whumptober 2019 [21]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Clave Politics (Shadowhunter Chronicles), Fights, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Whumptober 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-01
Updated: 2019-11-01
Packaged: 2021-01-16 16:22:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21274130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WatchforWitches/pseuds/WatchforWitches
Summary: Magnus doesn't agree with a call the Clave made, he and Alec argue about it





	Humiliated

**Author's Note:**

> Hey everyone! Still around and kicking away at Whumptober! Bear with me as I finish up the last few days! I don't want to rush and have fics that aren't as good as they could be!
> 
> This one is for the prompt Humiliation. It's placed somewhere near the end of season 2, after Magnus and Alec are back together. This story is told from Magnus' pov and talks about how he struggles with this argument. I'm not saying Alec was in the wrong, or that he wouldn't try and understand Magnus' opinion, its just the way the story lays out it would be really long to delve into both perspectives. I hope you enjoy!

"That was completely humiliating!" Magnus is yelling before he is barely out of the portal and in his own living room. "Alexander do you have any idea how that just made me look? How awful that looked on everyone?!"

Alec is quiet, but Magnus can see the anger in his eyes, in his posture. He's every bit as furious as Magnus feels, and for some reason that makes it worse. "I was trying to protect children," Alec grinds out, jaw tight.

"While completely disregarding the fact that the Clave should not be trusted with children!" Magnus is pacing up and down the living room, while Alec sits and stews on their couch. "Those kids weren't all shadowhunters, they shouldn't be put in the care of shadowhunters. The Clave doesn't care about playing nice with downworlder kids."

"You're blowing this way out of proportion," Alec presses back, "All those kids were under Valentine's sick mind games. They need to be checked over by the Clave, they might have information we need."

"They are children!" Magnus yells back, "They are scared and probably hurt and throwing them to the Clave like nothing more than pawns in Valentine's game is wrong!"

"They will be at the institute tomorrow!" Alec finally raises his voice, "They will be relocated! Stop acting like they weren't pawns to him, everyones a pawn to him it doesn't matter how old they are!"

Magnus turns sharply to look at Alec, "Don't talk to me about Valentine's pawns like I don't know! Like I wasn't one! Like every second I spent in his body didn't make me feel completely useless! You don't understand."

Magnus has been alive for hundreds of years, he's gotten pretty good at walking away from a fight that he knows isn't going anywhere. It hadn't been that long since he and Alec got back together, and he wasn't about to let this argument tear them apart, as much as he wants to scream until his lungs give out, until Alec understands. Sometimes, you can't make people understand. That's the worst part of all this, Magnus had to stand there and look at the faces of a dozen or so kids whose fear directly reflected his own. He had to listen to Clave representatives talk about them like they weren't there, like they weren't hurting. He had to stand and watch every shadowhunter say nothing in the face of this. When he had tried to interject, to say something, to help these kids, Alec had grabbed his arm, shaken his head, and told him it wasn't a fight he could win. He didn't even let him try. When Magnus yelled out loud, about the safety of the kids, about their happiness, he was asked to leave.

No one has to ask him to leave now. He gives Alec one final look, as if to say _Are you going to try and stop me again?_ When he gets nothing in reply he leaves, stalks off the his bedroom, and wishes so badly he could have taken all those kids home and made them feel safe and loved.

Warlocks couldn't have children. It wasn't something they always knew, not when Magnus was younger. There were no studies done for people like him. Nobody cared if Warlocks could have kids, most people just wanted them dead. He was about 100 when he started to realize he probably couldn't have children. He had slept with enough women to have had at least one pregnancy scare, but nothing ever happened. Then he was with a man- Edmund- for a number of years and hadn't really thought of children and pregnancies. He was over 140 when it was confirmed, that not just himself but all warlocks were infertile. When the study came to light from the early days of the spiral labyrinth, shadowhunters everywhere scoffed. _No warlock is fit to raise children anyways, thank the angel they can't_. He remembers the pain of the comments, remembers quietly mourning a piece of his life that he had thought untouchable.

He raised fellow downworlders, they were his children, that had been enough. Until golden boy Alec Lightwood walked into his life. Until he had drunkenly confessed to Magnus he wanted children, a big family made up of kids that he could help, kids he could raise. Magnus had never let himself even consider the idea of children before Alec.

It was ridiculous, he chastised himself, undressing angrily for bed, they hadn't even been together a year. It wasn't like Alec had said he wanted kids with Magnus, he had been drunk silly, he would have said anything. Well, no, not anything, but Magnus was too mad at Alec to be in his corner right now.

The point was, he had never been able to have children, but he wanted to, wanted to protect them desperately. All of those kids that stood in the courtroom today in front of the Clave, looking around like they were about to be taken away again. They weren't his kids, but they wore his pain, they had looked to him for help. They weren't his kids, but if they had been, would Alec have reacted the same? Would he have reasoned the same way he had tonight?

He can't let himself think like that, he knows, that's not what this is about. Still, Magnus is a flurry of emotions and he can't think through them straight. He just hopes this brick wall between him and Alec that the Clave relies on to break them apart won't actually. They've had variations of this fight before, and Magnus hopes that this doesn't ruin them. He falls asleep with the hope that things will look clear in the morning.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos/Comments/Feedback are all welcome and greatly appreciated! <33


End file.
